Triumphant, the Phoenix rises yet again

Respresentative of my pre-design career creations, Tree of Fire is a black posterboard cut
on red posterboard, digitally enhanced, c. 2000. To see what will hopefully influence the
illustrations on this blog, check highschoolart tag on my Flickr photostream.

[Piggybacking off of yesterday's Recovery is Transformation post, I decided to publish this post that has been sitting patiently in the drafts folder for about a month waiting for me to illustrate it. Alas, the words in my head are demanding their rightful place on the page first. I've come to the resolution that I can illustrate a post at a later point. Pics in my head are awesome, though. I can't wait for you to see them as well as read them. Without further ado...]

A storyline that is developing + will continue to play out in these articles is the disconnect, discord + subsequent distress that is created when unrealistic expectations clash + collide hard with reality.

Understatement of the year: the internal devastation that results is difficult to traverse.

 
The Prequel to The Phoenix's Rise
The cliched story of the 'Phoenix Rising From The Ashes' is often used as an inspiration of hope; triumph over adversity. However, people rarely think about the adversity itself; that catastrophic fire. Nor does anyone consider the cause.

According to various sources of lure (conveniently consolidated via wikipedia), at the end of several hundred years of living, the mythical bird is legend to build + set ablaze its own nest, reducing itself as well as the nest to ashes, from which a new, young phoenix, re-birthed, rises anew to live once more for another several hundred years.

[Image specs: fiery Phoenix similar to Tree of Fire, above; inspired by Jean Grey's embodiment of The Pheonix Force as in The Dark Pheonix Saga... because I'm actually a mega-ultra-dork like that + these four chickies were my heroes growing up/still are:]


My Pop-Culture Contribution to the Phoenix
I've always envisioned the Phoenix story a little different: less of a peaceful, resigned act + more of a crash+burn scenario.

A horrific crash+burn caused by the heavy baggage that the winged creator had been collecting over several hundreds of years of living life; straining in vain to carry on.

The baggage that made flying, an innate ability, much more arduous. The baggage that began to drag along the treetops + get snagged along the rough, rocky ground as the bird struggled in exhaustion, flying lower + lower. The baggage that eventually caused the horrific fiery crash.

In my version, that baggage is the silent antagonist that is eventually destroyed in fire -- burned away to ashes -- from which the Phoenix rises; free to soar again as nature intended.

[Image specs: one little birdie fighting to fly with 20+ bags on strings... think something similar to Twitter's fail-whale.]


Heavy Lifting
The baggage of unrealistic expectations that I acquired (thanks, world, for the 'no-thank-you helping') + that I have carried around with me for years has recently met the same fiery fate.

But, the crash+burns (aka: my depressions) required to destroy all my baggage, nearly destroys me as well in the process.

Nearly.

As I like to say in conversation with my fellow Phoenixes: "Almost but still kicking."

Followed by jubilant high-fivesies.


[Image specs: two little twitter-like birdies with scuffs + bandages, rising from their respective mushroom clouds in the distance + meeting in the middle for jubilant high-fivesies. *Swack!* 'Success!"]